Revisiting My Caretaking Diary

“Shortly after my wife Lisa passed away, I ran into a neighbor who lost her husband ten years earlier. Although we were both widowed, the circumstances were very different. My wife died after a very difficult and long (4 year) bout with cancer. Her husband died instantly from a heart attack.

We asked each other the obvious question: Is it better to lose someone quickly, so they don’t have to go through prolonged suffering … or is it better to have the opportunity to be with them longer, prepare for the inevitable and say the things one needs to say, even though we must watch them in pain? After weighing the pros and cons, we came to the conclusion that . . .”